Hey, it’s Bella (with a little help from Cooper, one of our CPAs here at Tannery).
If you’re in a serious relationship, talking about marriage, or maybe just moved in together… let’s talk money.
Cooper just celebrated his first wedding anniversary on April 13th (shoutout to him and his wife!), and on April 27th, I’ll have been with my boyfriend for four years. We’re not married yet, but it’s on the horizon.
Between the two of us, we’ve had many conversations about credit scores, debt, and shared expenses.
We’ve also made some mistakes—and learned a ton along the way.
So, this isn’t a lecture. It’s more like: “Hey, here’s what we wish someone had told us before things got serious.”
And here’s the thing: it doesn’t matter if you’re starting like us or have been married for 20 years—talking about money is always important. Whether you’re navigating finances for the first time or revisiting long-standing habits, there’s always room to grow together as a couple.
Why Credit Scores Matter in Relationships
Yes, we’ve all heard “credit scores matter.” But it’s not just about the number.
It’s what that number says.
Does your partner pay bills on time? Do they max out cards and ignore them? Do they treat their checking account like it’s fake money?
Think of it like a financial dating profile. It tells you more than a dinner conversation ever will…
If you wouldn’t go into business with someone without knowing their money habits, you shouldn’t sign a lease (or a marriage license) blindly, either.
Red Flags Are Real (But Some Are Fixable)
Some things to look out for:
- Secretive spending – “I didn’t think you needed to know I bought that.” It’s funny until it’s a car or something.
- Avoiding money conversations – If your partner gets defensive when money comes up, that’s a problem.
- Financial YOLO mindset – “I’ll retire on vibes and DoorDash stocks.” Lol, no, you won’t.
- Debt – Is ok, but you should know where you both stand (how much, what’s the interest rate, etc.).
But don’t panic. If you can talk about them honestly, these things don’t have to be dealbreakers.
Show Me Yours (The Pre-Marriage Money Talk Checklist)
Before you start combining lives, do this:
1. Pull your credit reports and review them together
Your credit score impacts everything from home buying to car loans. If there’s anything weird in there, talk about it.
Use free tools like Credit Karma.
2. Talk about income and future plans
Are you both working? Do you have a plan if one of you wants to go back to school, change careers, or take time off to raise kids?
Financial planning isn’t just about the now; it’s about the next 10+ years.
3. Share your financial goals
Buying a house? Early retirement? Starting a business? Try to get aligned with your vision.
4. Lay out your debt
Student loans, credit cards, medical debt, car payments. What do you owe, and how are you handling it?
6. Build a starter budget
Don’t wait until you’re married to figure out who’s paying for groceries.
7. Talk about boundaries
What’s a “you can buy that without asking” number? $50? $500? $5000? ($5000 j/k, but seriously).
Need help having the money talk with your partner? We’re here for you.
So, When Should You Talk About This?
Not on your first date. (Please.)
But before you sign a lease, open a joint account, or start planning a wedding? 1000%.
The earlier you talk about money, the less awkward it becomes later. It is a lot easier to fix a broken budget than it is to fix broken trust.
Final Thoughts: Love, Marriage, and Money
We’re not saying you need to turn your relationship into a business deal.
We’re saying if you’re building a life together, build the foundation first.
Because money isn’t just dollars—it’s values, habits, goals, and trust. The best marriages aren’t just built on love; they’re built on smart money moves and shared financial goals.
If you’re ready to build something lasting, we’d love to help you start strong.
Good luck:)
Cooper and Bella
